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感悟:托福作文是寫給全世界看的
今天,我反復研究了一篇ets托福的6分作文,給我最深的感受就是任何一篇ets打上了6分的作文,應該都是可以傳到世界上每一個考托福角落的考生手上的作文,"它"經得起時間的考驗,基本上經得起每一個托福考生的考驗,基本上過得了每一個托福研究機構的眼睛。它所要做到的,如果讓我用兩個字來概括它的內涵,讓我想起的是“中庸”二字。今天,ets要我寫“音樂反應中國文化”的論題,我的心有點震撼.....因為在這么短的時間,這么少的字,要表現這么一個深刻的主題,是不容易的。我想把我今天寫的這篇文章先交給我的母校--武漢大學的這塊小小的論壇板塊上的學友看看,看看能否經得起同學們的眼睛。因為我想,我們gter在寫托福作文的時候,ets是通過我們來了解我們,不但我們的寫作水平,還了解我們這個人,另外的,通過千千萬萬對于這個論題寫作的中國學生來看我們的民族,來了解我們的文化,同時增長ets本身的見識和水平。另外,ets還可能要把你的6分作文傳到世界上所有考托福的考生的手上,經起全球gter的考驗,你所反映的民族文化會影響看到所有看你作文的人。所以,我本人也不敢馬虎。在這里,我先拿出的是自己的作文。接著的是ets的參考6分作文。我想,這兩篇作文的距離到底有多遠呢?我的英語水平很差,能力也非常有限,請各位學兄,學姐,學弟,學妹傾情指教。
ets是這樣平靜而有深度的提問的“Music tells us something about a culture. What does the music of your country reveal about of your country?Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.”
答:
It is very lucky for me to introduce the music of our motherland, china,to the friends who come from different parts of the world.The topic about the relationships between the music and our culture is so large for me to reveal its deep and gorgeous personality in such a short essay ,for that our motherland has such a long history ,has so many different areas,and so many people.And different area has different styleof music in different stage of her history.But in our heart, one point is certain:we have a common motherland:China.
In different stage of this ancient civilized country,she conceives different musics, and these musics correspond to different cultures.Among all of these musicics,what I would like to introduce to you is the classical music which is performanced by zheng,a Chinese zither with 25 strings,because in the ancient time ,the great thinker Confucius said 'music is used to teach people of the country'And he supported that music which is on the same way of nature fits everyone in every different stage of history.It traverses history and transcends boundaries between different countries .Zheng,for example,if you have opportunity to listen to its music,you may hear nature.You may feel that you are talking to nature.You can hear the blossoming of flowers,the flowing of rivulet,the rolling of tides to deep sea .You can see the working of honest people and the love of nature that comes from your deep heart.Listen hard,then you see the great heros living in history; the splendor of this glebe;the smiles of the beauties....then you appreceive the grandness of the deep culture of this ancient country. This is the verve of these 25 strings :simple,plain,ordinary ,but its charm is vast,deep,gorgeous,and distant.It is possible that every people who has once felt it would never forget it as you never forget the beauty of nature and the personality of yourself. The charm of the music ,just as you listen to it.When you feel it,you can touch the heart of its deep culture.I don't know if I could change the topic a little"Music tells us much about a culture".To learn its culture,you had better listen to its music first.
我本人對我的作文的評價是“內容不夠簡潔,用詞不夠精確,句勢還不夠恰當,寫作速度太慢,考試要吃虧的”其中,為了做到“賞心悅目”,讓沒有聽到過的古箏的人對它發生好奇,我沒有把金山詞霸上面對古箏的解釋中“with 25 strings”去掉.
下面是我看了許多遍,也抄了許多遍的ets范文,同時,也為這篇范文的魅力深深感染Insgroupsto answer the question, "what does the music of your country reveal about the culture of your country?" I would like to introduce myself. I am from Spain, I was born in a region called Catalonia, concretely in a town near Barcelona.
In my opinion, the music tells us a lot of a culture, and someone could learn a lot from the spanish culture just listening to music in her room. But it is not easy to collect a representative sample of the spanish music, because of the enormous variety, every region of Spain has its own music, that sounds com pletely different from the rest, and even for some regions there are more than one type of tipical music. This variety is very important because shows that Spain is a counry of countries, each one with a particular personality.
It is very interesting to discover the different personality of the spanish regions, just listening how their music sounds like. For example, in the south of Spain people are known for being very funny and for their good sense of humor. In this part of Spain you can find mainly two kinds of music: the Flamenco and the Sevillanas. Sevillas have completly the personality of andalusian people, it is very cheerful. However, Flamenco sounds sad and deep. The reason is that although andalusian people have a good mood, they live in one of the poor est part of Spain, and they express their pain through the flamenco music.
Finally, I would like to say that I personally agree with the statement that music tells us something about a culture, and with my example example I wanted to illustrate, how much of the culture of a country it is possible to learn just listening to its music.
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